|The view when you land in Erbil International Airport (EIA)|
So... here are some 911 tips I have put together for my friend and anyone else whose going to make me proud and decide to return to Kurdistan for good:
1. Try to blend in, because everything you do and say counts differently because you are "awropi" (your actions will be closely observed, and admired, because somehow everyone in your family sees you as a role model) try to be 'xomani' more, meaning: Don't eat shooti (watermelon) with a fork and certainly do not complain about having too many calories in the food.
2. Rehearse the answers to these two questions as if you were sitting in your PhD viva: Firstly, Why did you come back? and secondly, "So where do you like more, here or there!" I gave you the question that will be in the examination , so I will leave you to formulate your own analalytical response.
3. Remember this is not the UK, so if you send an email to your new boss or a colleague do call them and say that you have sent them an email. Otherwise don't expect a reply. (By the way, for your information Korek has this service where you can take phone balance from your siblings.)
4. Have many chill pills with you, because there are always people who expect great results but are not willing to put in the effort (you will bump into few of them) ... but don't be frustrated, this is why you are there, so that you can change this and contribute to developing this society.
5. If you're a girl, and not interested in any unwanted attention then wear decent clothing. Best if long pants for work, short sleeve is fine but not too open a the front. Dresses or skirts above the knees is sometimes fine, but it will only make you feel like you are Miss Universe on the catwalk. :)
|Sometimes you need to cross your legs, sit on the ground and eat with your hands.|
7. If you're single, then before your plane lands your mum and sisters will have found you many brides, and will probably want you to start seeing them one by one starting from tomorrow. Or even better they will take you to every single wedding and point at every single beautiful girl. I'm sorry, can't offer any advice here. My role is only to prepare you!
8. You will go back, and land with a job that will probably be half of what you are paid here but you will have to work much harder to prove yourself and 'fix' the situation. But there will always be times where you will feel like no one appreciates you. This is normal. My advice? Prove you are stronger than all the forces that will be blowing like strong wind against you- you can always keep a blog!
9. There will be times when you are going to miss watching a movie online or dread waiting for 15 minutes for a 10 minute video to load on Youtube. You will miss the fast internet connection and the wireless where ever you go. At times like this there is always Divan hotel (oh so posh!) and Costa [Ricca].
10. Finally be ready to listen, eat, sleep, think and talk politics. Every single person from the taxi driver, your hair dresser to the dinner gatherings at your place everyone has a political opinion.
As for my dear, loyal Twitter friend who is going back to Kurdistan and leaving the life of the west, all I can say is: Fly to the nest, fly with your wings wide... fly my friend, for the nest is waiting for you.
|sar sarw sar chaw!! |
You are going to love Kurdish hospitality
*And Lots and Lots and Lots of Ferrero Rochers, but don't tell mum, she will simply call and say: "You can't live on chocolate, kchm xwardn bxo, xwardn!!